it's your turn.

I have been reading through this quick read by Paul Riser (Mad About You) titled "Babyhood". He also has a read titled "Couplehood" which I have not read yet. Since parenthood is quite relavent to us, I have been finding this book hilarious. I am posting it, because I think some others out there might, too, find it all too true.

Here is the excerpt:

And it is here that you learn the three words that become the chief verbal staple of any household with a baby: It's Your Turn.
This phrase is the theme song of any marriage once it goes from Two to Three.
"I just changed him twenty minutes ago...It's your turn."
"I've been watching him all day. It's your turn!"
"I simply cannot stand up; it's your turn!"

This all-purpose phrase also works as a marital greeting. The "Hi-sweetie-how-was-your-day" of yesteryear is now replaced with the more simple, direct, and mildy irritated "It's your turn."
Before you have a child, you and your spouse are many things to each other: friends, lovers, competitors, partners...Upon producing a child, you relate to eachother primarily as sentries.
The two of you are guards who rotate shifts monitoring and protecting your new charge.
When Baby enters your world, there's no time for intimate conversation between Husband and Wife. In fact, the extentof conversation often consists solely of the reporting of Baby's "eating-sleeping-pooping" status - just before the changing of the guard.
"Hi."
"He ate, he napped, he needs to be changed."
"I just walked in. Can I take a shower?"
"You should've showered before we had a kid. It's your turn."
Then, like buck privates relieving one another at Guantanamo, you're on duty and your wife gets a four-hour pass.